Former East German track coach claims transgender vindication


Following stories of several male athletes pretending to be females winning female competitions in the United States, a former East German athletic coach feels vindicated. 

Klaus Beyersdorf, former track and field coach for the former East Germany said of the former athletic competition, “We were just ahead of our time.  We always believed the best way to beat women in athletics was to do it with men.  It’s just that back then we couldn’t be so open about it.”

East Germany was often accused of using questionable “female” athletes competing in international events, most notably track and field.  Many were viewed as a bit brutish.

Beversdorf, now semi-retired and living in Munster, Germany, continued, “The Olympic testing agency was always testing, testing, testing.  We just figured the fact that so many of our “female” athletes had penises and testicles would have tipped them off, but they just wanted to test. So, we let them test.  Heck, some of them had more facial hair than Karl Marx.  It was right in front of their eyes, but the folks in the lab coats never figured it out.”

“We didn’t need letters, you know, LBGTQLMNO, or whatever.  We just let guys be gals.  Well, sort of.”

During its years as a separate communist country, East Germany was always formidable in international athletic competition.  Following the fall of communism in Europe, using males in female events fell out of favor.  Now, it seems quite fashionable again.

Beversdorf said he follows the United States closely.  “The whole gender equality stuff seems to have run its course,” he noted.  “Now that communism and socialism are back in vogue among young people again, it stands to reason that some of our attitudes and behaviors would be emulated.  Except now they don’t even have to hide it.  Men can be women whenever they choose.  Is this a great world, or what?”

As the transgender issue is one of the main topics for the Democratic presidential contenders, several candidates were asked for a comment.  Only Joe Biden responded by noting, “As president, I will make sure Hunter never goes to East Germany.”

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