Disney+ Will Have Every Single Program Ever, Past or Present

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BURBANK: Disney CEO Robert Iger announced today that Disney’s new streaming service Disney+ will feature every single bit of entertainment ever created and ever to be created. This will raise its profile as a competitor to Netflix and Hulu.

“We have reached to the farthest reaches of the space-time continuum to bring you entertainment from eras and dimensions previously unheard of,” said Iger. “We want to make sure the Disney consumer is not disappointed by the selection.

“Want to see the cave paintings of Ooog the Conqueror from Lascaux? Or the last Flarg of Glimthrix the Blonn, all the way from Alpha Centauri? Maybe the highlights of the Kid’s Choice Awards 2095? A portal into quantum space where universes begin and end? They’re all there and on Disney+”

“Unfortunately, getting the licensing for MTV’s ‘The State’ has proven elusive. We’re hoping to have that by 2022.”

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